This cannot be real. This could not have been Michael's fate. He was so young. He had his whole life ahead of him. This could not have happened. I am still in so much shock. I so desperately want this to just be a horrific dream. I don't want to walk this path of life without Michael. He is such an amazing man. How can this be possible?
Michael and I had a big discussion about him getting a motorcycle. I told him how I felt. That it scared me to death and if something were to happen to him, I don't know what I would do. I told him that everyone I know who has ridden a motorcycle has been hurt by them. I told him that he was an adult and I was not going stop him from being happy. Did I seal his fate when I didn't put up a fight? He did everything right though. He took 2 safety courses. He took really good care of his bike. He was always wearing his helmet and gloves. He never went 10 mph over the speed limit. He was as safe as you could be on one of those things. How did this happen?!
Why aren't there time machines?
Why didn't I tell him to take his car because it looked like it was going to rain that day?
Why did I have to ask him to feed the dogs?
Maybe, just maybe it would have put him 5 minutes ahead of that reckless old man.
Why was that man driving?
Why us? We were good. Our marriage was at its best. We were more in love than ever.
Why does it have to be like this?
I never want Michael to be a distant memory. Just something that I think about from time to time.
Oh God... please just give me peace.